is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
