why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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