Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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