I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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