I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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