i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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