seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
