the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize