if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
