im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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