Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
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fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
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our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down