I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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