Sorry, I don't speak sober.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Randomize