officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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