I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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