how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
