Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
