Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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