I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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