I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
