Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize