best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
