After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
