Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
