He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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