She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
well you can't waste a boner
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
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I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
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