My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
