Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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