i permit you to call me
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize