Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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