i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
