a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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