I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
