that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
This house was built for laser tag.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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