He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
