i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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