It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
