Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize