I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Just puked most of my soul out..
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