Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
