she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
3 2 1 whiskey
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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