Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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