But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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