i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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