Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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