I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
