I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
