I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon