i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize