I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Quick, to the slutcave!
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
